Memories
Dear Julie,
Although our paths have gone different ways in the past few years, I will keep a unique memory of the energy, joy and love that you knew how to spread all around you. You will be missed.
Love
Nic
Julie and I used to talk a lot of crap about TV's shows like LOST and theorise (again I will not use a 'Z' there, it's just wrong) as to where they were going with it.
We discussed our lives, hopes and dreams.
Seen as we were stuck together at joining desks for the whole day (and at the beginning it did seem like we were stuck there, seen as her being a Taurus and me being an Aries) we didn't hit it off right away but over time we realised that we had a lot in common.
Her ridiculous sense of humour was the same as mine and I remember one day she showed me a letter we received in HR. It had printed on the back 'CONTENTS INSIDE'. We got a lot of mileage out of that one.
This message is littered with non American spelling that would have driven her crazy.
Julie I'll miss you and I will always keep my stupid sense of humour I know you would want that.
Your friend,
John
Dear, sweet Julie,
I can remember doing this for our high school year books... I never could have imagined that I would be writing about our memories on a memorial website at 31... Every time I think about what has happened, I can't breathe. I can't make any sense of this--I've tried and I just can't. Some things you can find a reason for; this, this I just cannot understand. What a tragedy... And what a legacy you have left behind. So many friends, so many people whose lives you've touched... When I think back to my teenage memories, I find it near impossible to find a happy one that doesn't have you in it. You made everything fun, everything good. Were it not for you & jme, i wouldn't have been who i was, i wouldn't be who i am. You were a constant and true friend to me--you gave me confidence, you taught me how to have fun, you made me feel like I belonged. So many 'firsts' in my life happened with you by my side. I'm smiling through the tears when I think of some of them--you were even there for my first kiss--I looked past the guy to you to see if you approved and you gave me a thumb's up, but mouthed the words "close your eyes!" There are so many memories like this that are making me smile at a time when that seems impossible. When I think of how hard you pushed me to go to mexico with you, I am so grateful that you were always so persistent with me. Maybe it's a sad thing to admit, but they were and have always been three of the best weeks of my life. I will cherish that experience with you forever. As I will so many others. I am filled with so much regret when I think about how much time we used to spend together vs. how much it has been of late. I always thought there would be more time. That I would finally be able to convince you (and dani) to move back to rochester--you know how hard I tried! :-) That I would make the trip to Barcelona soon. That I would write more. I wish that I had just seized life like you always did, and had just come. The kids will always be this, life will always be that,... there will always be something--I should have just remembered how short life is and done it... How I will regret this forever...
I am so grateful that I saw you one more time. I am so glad that my little boys say your name & dani's name and know how much fun you are. I will always cherish the gifts you've given them, so special and sweet. I try not to think of "objects" with so much reverence, but your gifts to them have been a material way for me to hold on to you when I missed you the most. Chocolates get eaten :-) , but sweet little baby clothes and books never fade. Sometimes--even long before this--I would take some of the little outfits you've given them out and just hold them & think about how I missed you. I'll probably be doing this like a crazy person from now on! :)
The memory of you & dani running around your parent's backyard with my little ones is the picture I am struggling to hold on to when I am trying to get the image of what has happened out of my head. I am picturing the smiles on your faces and the life in your eyes. I just wish I had known that when I said goodbye to you on the step that day that it would be the last time--I never would have let you go.....
I will miss you always, Julie... Thank you for everything. Thank you for loving me and for being you. Without you, I wouldn't be me. Love you.....
memories:
there are far too many to count in 29 years- there is not one day i don't think of you. sitting here drinking my coffee, we should be IMing, as you prepared to leave work...it helped the distance not seem as far.
you are in every dream i have, you are truly etched into my life...in a way i don't know how i will get through this. it is like saying there will be no more sun- just get used to it. it is WRONG on every level.
your absence leaves me without hope. the last two years since my mom died, have been so bleak- i know how hard they were for you also (*spider jane* hee hee)...but it was hope that things could improve that kept me going- you helped with that, always supportive and encouraging...somehow when it is someone older, even your own mother- it makes the slightest bit of sense- and you are subtly prepared for the imminence of their loss...even when it is similarly tragic and sudden...
but now, you won't be there...it takes the fun out of anything that could possibly happen, before it even has...i take comfort in knowing you were truly happy, finally...but i am so angry i cannot see you live out your dreams and goals as we had discussed from such a young age. all hopes and expectations of LIFE are torn into bits...we were supposed to be the oldest friends- in the guiness book of world records...98 years together, at least.
of course everyone knows how special you are- i just hope you know how you have impacted everyone's lives...especially mine. i feel as though we were twins and i have to go on without a part of me. you are my sister in every sense of the word- we are blood.
Julie came around to my house one night for dinner. She spoke Catalan to my wife, which I thought was kinda cool. We had dinner and talked about how she was looking for a new apartment. She found and new place and found a boyfriend too. I saw her getting out of his car one morning outside the office with a smile on her face. That made me happy.
It is always nice to have a native speaker around to talk about the A-Team and other silly TV stuff we watched as children. Then she moved dept. and we didn’t see each other so often. She was always around though good old Kupps. Suppose she always will be, in conversations we’ll have now and again here in BCN and anywhere else we might remember our BCN years.
Thanks for making me happy Kupps.
Total Memories: 18
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